A husband and wife home from work, both absorbed in their phones, talking only about school, the shopping and the electricity bill: Muhammad Muhsin Mashkur opens his piece on Prothom Alo's religion page with this familiar scene. In his view the distance is growing in modern life, and the Quran and Hadith show the way back.
He cites verse 21 of Surah Ar-Rum, in which Allah says He created spouses for people from among themselves so that they may find tranquillity in them, and placed love and mercy between them. In the writer's reading, the first purpose of marriage is peace; love shows itself in deeds, words and behaviour; and it is not complete without tenderness and care.
The first lesson is kindness to one's family. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said the best of people is the one who is best to his family (Sunan al-Tirmidhi, hadith 3895). The second is accepting each other's faults: a hadith in Sahih Muslim (1469) says a believing man should not hate a believing woman, for if he dislikes one trait in her he will be pleased with another.
The third is sharing the housework. Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) said the Prophet (peace be upon him) busied himself with his family's work at home and went out for prayer when its time came (Sahih al-Bukhari, hadith 676). The fourth is good conduct, which verse 19 of Surah An-Nisa commands: live with them in kindness.
The fifth is being each other's protection. Verse 187 of Surah Al-Baqarah calls spouses each other's garments; as clothing covers and protects, the writer explains, husband and wife should guard each other and not expose each other's faults.
He recalls that the Prophet (peace be upon him) raced Aisha (Sunan Abu Dawud, hadith 2578), a sign that a home is a place of joy as well as duty. His suggestion: put the phone away at night, ask your spouse about their day, offer a word of praise and make time to laugh together.
Photo: Ferdous / Wikimedia Commons (CC BY-SA 3.0)
Source: Prothom Alo
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